Popping out isn’t a straightforward factor to do, particularly whenever you’re undecided of what you’re feeling. For a lot of who determine as homosexual, it’s one thing they know and really feel from an early age. As a freelancer expertise director, Tee Lindsay had an inkling of his sexuality on the age of seven however didn’t perceive the right solution to label his attraction till a number of years later.
Lindsay got here from an extremely spiritual family, and with that got here a good greater concern of how his household would react to his fact earlier than he was able to reveal it to them. In some ways, he didn’t wish to disappoint them. Add to that not desirous to be teased or bullied by classmates and pondering there’s one thing incorrect with you, you begin to internalize the whole lot.
As we proceed to have a good time Satisfaction Month, EBONY spoke with Tee Lindsay to be taught extra about his liberating journey of popping out to his church-going household as a homosexual Black man.
EBONY: At what age did you notice and perceive your sexuality? Who was that individual you confided in?
Tee Lindsay: Undoubtedly as early as elementary faculty. My earliest reminiscence has to have been in second grade, however by fifth grade, I knew what to name my attraction. I confided in my late, finest buddy, Tymisha Grey. We had been hanging out in her dorm once I advised her. She was extraordinarily supportive and confirmed me a lot love. She even helped me come out to another pals. I miss her lots.
How did your loved ones react whenever you advised them? Had been you afraid to inform them?
I didn’t get an opportunity to inform my household. I used to be outed by somebody my dad and mom attended church with. I used to be positively afraid to inform them, and I feel their response confirmed why I used to be. They yelled, cried and prayed over me. Then got here lots of lecturing and ultimatums, however actually I suppose they largely felt harm as a result of I had stored this secret that so many others knew. It was like they didn’t know their son in addition to they thought they did. It type of added insult to harm within the scenario.
After I was outed, I used to be initially shocked as a result of deep down I knew it was solely a matter of time primarily based on the best way I used to be transferring. I feel my unconscious hoped it occurred as a result of after I didn’t actually have something to cover from anybody; it was all on the market within the open. So a way of aid positively adopted a number of days after. Fortunately, since that day, I’ve felt a optimistic shift in our relationship.
Did you’re feeling stress from society to cover the true you from the world?
I used to really feel it lots, particularly rising up within the church. Not essentially from the overused “God hates gays” perspective, however extra so from understanding different queer individuals who hid who they had been from the world. I felt that I wanted to try this as nicely. After I turned an grownup, I finally stopped feeling that stress. However, then once I entered the leisure business, particularly working within the music business, I started to really feel it once more. I attempted my finest to come back off as not “too homosexual” or female. As I’ve grown within the business, and as a person, I’ve gotten to a spot the place I’m extraordinarily comfy with who I’m.
How does it really feel to be dwelling in your fact in 2023? Is that this one thing your youthful self would’ve imagined?
It feels superb, however I do suppose I at all times knew I’d finally be dwelling out loud and proud. I’m somebody who can solely tolerate being uncomfortable for thus lengthy. Rising up, I simply didn’t know what that image of me dwelling my fact would seem like, however it’s secure to say I painted a reasonably image.