There’s one thing deeply uncooked and exquisite about witnessing somebody stand on the fringe of their consolation zone — unsure however prepared. That’s precisely what we noticed unfold in episode 3 of Virgin Island. It wasn’t nearly flirting, first kisses, or cheeky challenges. It was about braveness, vulnerability, and the quiet, highly effective journey of constructing confidence.
We’ve labored with many individuals who assume confidence is one thing you both have or don’t. As if it have been a set trait, gifted to some and elusive to others. However confidence isn’t a swap, it’s a muscle. Like all muscle, it must be educated, stretched, and, at occasions, rested.
Celeste in a confidence train with ‘Virgin Island’ participant Emma
On the island, we watched as a few of the contributors confronted actual inside battles — questioning their desirability, evaluating themselves to others, doubting whether or not they have been “doing it proper.”
These aren’t simply relationship dilemmas; they’re deeply human ones. And the reality is, confidence is born in these moments. Not within the shiny spotlight reels, however within the wobbly bits. The bits that make us really feel uncovered, but additionally, when tended to softly, liberated.
So What Does It Truly Imply to Construct Confidence?
As sexologists and coaches, right here’s what we consider:
1. Confidence begins with acceptance, not efficiency.
You don’t must turn into another person to really feel assured. You’ll want to discover ways to be absolutely, lovingly your self. Which means making peace together with your physique, your wishes, your awkward snigger, your quiet voice, or your daring vitality — no matter your reality is. The folks on Virgin Island who began to shine weren’t the loudest or most polished. They have been those studying to really feel at house in themselves.
Tom constructing confidence by bodily exercise workout routines on ‘Virgin Island’
2. Confidence is about connection, not comparability.
Comparability is the thief of pleasure and confidence. It distracts you from your individual magic.
Constructing confidence means turning down the quantity on who you assume you ought to be, and tuning into who you truly are. Once we noticed the islanders start to attach authentically with one another — with out masks, with out video games — that’s when confidence actually bloomed.
3. Confidence grows if you take dangers.
It’s in these moments if you step outdoors your consolation zone (saying sure to vulnerability, attempting one thing new, talking your reality) that confidence begins to take root.
However threat doesn’t imply recklessness. It means leaning into your edges with intention, and ideally, with help. Confidence thrives if you’re surrounded by individuals who mirror your value again to you, who cheer you on, and who maintain area if you really feel uncertain.
On the present, we noticed how encouragement and sort curiosity helped people take daring steps and really feel actually seen. Even the bravest leaps really feel steadier when somebody is holding your hand.
4. Confidence doesn’t imply by no means feeling insecure.
That is maybe the largest fable of all. Even probably the most seemingly assured folks have self-doubt. The distinction is that they don’t let insecurity drive the automobile. They acknowledge it, soothe it, and maintain transferring ahead. Constructing confidence means practising braveness again and again, even when your voice shakes.
Zac kissing the hand of Pia throughout a confidence constructing train on ‘Virgin Island’
We’re pleased with what the contributors are studying — not nearly one another, however about themselves. As a result of in the end, that’s what sexual empowerment is about. It’s not nearly pleasure or attraction – it’s about standing in your individual mild, understanding you’re worthy of affection, contact, connection, and respect.
To everybody watching: know that your journey of confidence is legitimate and completely your individual. You don’t need to be the boldest within the room to be highly effective. Generally, the quietest voice saying “I’m sufficient” is the bravest voice of all.
Need to start constructing your individual confidence, from the within out? Discover our Confidence Activation information or self-paced digital courses to take the next move.